Note: I am not a
lawyer, therapist or adviser of any kind. This is based off of my personal
experiences.
I cannot stress the importance of keeping
thorough logs of everything in your case. Basically a journal of what happens.
Having a log makes it easier to recall the date something happened, to watch
for patterns, to remember details, etc. I have used my logs numerous times to
help me write court paperwork, to give as evidence to evaluators involved in
our case, and just to refresh my memory. Here is a list of SOME of the logs I
keep:
1. Contact from my Ex. - I keep logs of all of the contact we have. I write down
if I receive a text from him, an email, if I see him because he comes to pick
my daughter up for a visit, etc. I also
keep a log of the content of the communication. It includes copies of all emails, copies of all texts
and summaries of any time we speak on the phone. Yes, these logs get massive, but they
have been critical for reference.
2. I keep a log of all case communication. Emails and conversation summaries with my Ex, from and to my lawyers and any professionals assigned to the case.
3. I keep a time line of my case. This is
great when as time and the case go on I can reference what happened and in what order.
4. I keep a log of all court proceedings. Everything, whether
it is a court conference, hearing, or mediation, I make a note of when it was, what was being heard or discussed,
and what the ruling or outcome was. This is especially nice when you've
had multiple court dates. Note: this information is also included in my time
line.
4. I keep a log of things having to do
with visits. For instance, I write down how the pick-ups and drop-offs went, if
anything out of the norm happened. I include the mood changes in my daughter
and comments that she makes regarding how her time was spent or her feelings
about it.
5. I keep a physical copy of all important
papers. Start this from the beginning, keep it organized as you go. It's a
beast to organize after the fact. I will do another posting on what I did with
my binder in the future.
5. Keep your computer and electronic
documents well organized right from the start. Again, it's a beast to organize later. I
will do another post on this in the future.
These are just a few examples of logs you
can keep. The more you are prepared, the easier things will be on you in the
future, and the faster you can put together clear and accurate
court paperwork. Much of the information gets duplicated from one log to another, but
I have found that necessary for the purpose of keeping each log accurate and
complete, independent of the other logs.
You need to figure out what works best
for you and how best to keep your logs. It does take a lot of work
and it can be hard to faithfully update them. But remember that YOU are
the one that knows your case the best. If you don't have the information that
you need, you can't expect anyone else to. Even the best attorney only knows
your situation through you, not to mention that they have to juggle the information of several clients.
Please, Please Please start your logs now while events and dates are still fresh in your head. Down the road you might not recall the exact wording that was said or the order of things.
If you have a hard time remembering to update your logs daily, try making it a part of your morning or bedtime routine. Have a list of logs to update or, if you are using notebooks, leave them stacked in sight or in an easily accessible location.
