How to Act Around Someone Who is Getting a Divorce

I think that most people don't know what to say or how to act around someone that is getting a divorce.  The link in my last post touched just briefly on this, but I wanted to address it just a bit more. 

Divorce is traumatic, like death or an accident or losing one's job.  Except you don't get flowers, you probably won't get a sympathy card and people might avoid you because they don't know what to say.  Sometimes this is a good thing.  You might not want to dwell on your failed marriage and people bringing it up just might make the situation more sore.  At the same time, this is something you are going through and it is weird not to feel support.  Simply put: don't take it personally.  The people around you don't know your situation, even if you feel like you've told them. Some people will feel pitty, some people will scowl at you, some will ignore you because they might be having marital problems and talking about your divorce is not good for them at the moment.

My advice to those who know someone who is getting a divorce: Divorce is always sad.  No matter what the reasons or what the situation, it is always sad.  Realize that the parties involved are going through a drastic change in life.  Their finances, time, physical and mental energy among other things are being stretched.  Even if the person you know is getting out of a dangerous situation, they are still going through all of these things.  Don't necessarlily be affraid to ask them how they are doing.            Just letting them know that you are there for them is a huge thing.

My advice to those who are getting a divorce:  Don't expect masses of friends to come and support you.  Sad, I know.  But remember, they are nervous about saying the wrong thing.  Some may be proactive in checking in with you and some may not.  Family may be different, it just depends.  Keep up with family and friends, don't wait for them to call.  Call them up for an outing or what not.  Make sure not to crowd the conversation by continuously talking about your divorce.  I'm not saying don't talk about it, but don't make that the sole topic.  Make sure to keep up on prayer and other religious activities.  God will always be there for you.

Thats my advice as someone who has been through a divorce, take it or leave it.